the story

i told faust this story sometime ago and i just want to post this..

i dunno why..? i just want to..


...there was this person that was so contend about life.
this person seldom goes out ( the house, to hang out, etc..)
and has very few friends. there are even a number of times that,
that person is mistaken as an autistic by others
because of this habits but despite that it's still ok.

you can even hear that person laugh from the heart
and doesn't give a f*** on what others think.
that person's existence is pretty much defined and revolves on
the four corners of their house but its ok..

until he came..

that man is a part of that person's life.
it would have been ok at first but that man
is everything that person didn't expect..

and just like that, right in front of that person,
the man crumbled and crushed that sanctuary/world that,
that person loved so and claimed it as his own..

gripped w/ sadness beyond words,
that person was driven out, admitting defeat..

the person then reflected on the amount of time that was wasted..
the time when that man has not yet arrived..

"if only i took the time to come out of my shell-like-life
and seek another world out side, then
i should still have a place to go to.." the person thought

but no. the person can't go out any more
and has nowhere else to go.

..realization dawned into being...

the person now got a grasp why some people spent more time
outside than their homely sanctuary..
why others wanted to spend a night or two
on a friends room than his own..

simple..

if you don't feel that happiness anymore than being alone
then you'll start looking for it..a place where you can feel that
happiness you once felt, if not the same, even for a bit..

that feeling of security and serenity..

..home

some people, bless them, don't loose this at all
but that's what some people turn to search for,
and some not even knowing that themselves just goes on

..and on

..and on

..some of them would just say "hey, i just like it 'outside'."
but the truth is, people don't really like it outside
because of the horrors of it, but who would admit this?
and so a person bets it all to find it..

and once you found it, everything stops there, as if all of your
life's existance is there and there alone..
that every turn, horror, disapointment
you take was all worth it and you grab hold on to it to not let go..
afraid that you'll still wake up in somebody's room,
realizing it's someone else's happiness and not yours..

and then just like before, you'll shut your self once more
realizing finaly, you're home..

it a life's worth...




..but the question is still there, will you still find it?
..will it last..?