tactless

i have been always open about my life.
the only thing is, i don't mess
the people involve within it. normaly when
i have a particular problem about a friend
i consult another friend that doesn't
know or doesn't have any relation to
the person in question..

maybe i'm afraid of confrontations...
misconceptions..
consequences...

so when i have a problem with a friend
round my place, i seek advice from
another friend...

...from another place...

...(sigh)...

there is something going on between me
and a friend of mine...

i haven't told anyone anything from
the group that we share...

(ok i have told one of them
but that person already knows "the story"
long before i've told him...because "he"
(the one i have a problem with)
told "him" (the person i told)
already "in not so many words"..)

until last night when tragedy struck..

i know he won't tell no one about it
and neither did i, but a "friend" claims
she got the scoop about us directly from
me...!

me! who haven't told nobody else..!

i know he (person i told too) won't
open his mouth..

he's far to respectful of things...
he ows me, big time...

the friend i have a problem with
won't tell a soul too because
he hates this things more than i do..

doesn't make any sense eh..?

i felt numb...
cold...
...

she's a bit tactless...
(scoop girl)
i can't afford the possibilities...
i just can't...

if word spreads, it would appear like
i'm some fustrated bitch or something..?
i don't want for him, or them
to think of me that way...

(if you happen to know me personally,
dear reader, you would know what i mean...)

i'm just not the type...

....(Sigh)....

if i go talk to him, whould i appear to be
so defensive..?

guilty..?

on the other hand if i don't, what would
he think of me? gossiping around...?
some cheap girl i don't really appear to be?

i really hate this things...
i makes my head hurt and i can't think straight..

...crap...